I have made more friends in the last 6 months than I have in the last 5 years. Moving to a new country will force you to rapidly make new friends. It will force you to connect with people you would not have had you stayed at home.
This year I acquired friends from different corners of the world.
Why is this?
Not only did I move to a new country, but I also enrolled in a Masters programme at a university in the Netherlands full of people like me; international students looking to go on adventures and make new…
Flakey friends. We all have them. They do one or more of the following:
Why do some friendships endure and others simply fade away or blow up in your face?
Even with all these wonderfully easy methods of communication we now have, maintaining an adult friendship isn’t magically easier.
Are my friends just too busy or do they no longer care about the friendship?
I believe friendships endure for one simple reason:
We stay friends with people who are conveniently close by and easy to reach. The friends who live in the same city or down the road and who are keen to meet up and do things.
When things become too difficult…
My partner and I recently moved to the Netherlands. We love it. We somehow managed to immigrate during the covid pandemic. After multiple tests and canceled flights we safely landed in the Netherlands at the beginning of February.
It's not the same of course. There are a lot of things we cannot do.
We moved here to pursue Masters degrees in subjects we are both interested in. We planned for two years to move to Europe to work and study. And although covid delayed our plans, by almost a year, we managed to make it and settle down in Tilburg.
I gave up drinking almost two years ago. Well, excessive drinking. I wasn’t an alcoholic but like most twenty-year-olds, I drank to have fun. I got drunk almost every month. It was a part of my life. Too much a part of my life.
So I stopped drinking for a year. I did on the odd occasion have a glass of champagne or too but only the odd occasion.
I was an avid non-drinker. I avoided all alcohol and drank soft drinks when out with friends. The only exceptions I made were weddings or birthdays. …
Work is important. We need to work but how desperately do we need the job. While job searching recently I found myself looking for jobs that I thought would be great but for the wrong reasons.
A persistent thought I had when I found a ‘suitable’ job opening, was:
Imagine when I tell x,y,z…where I work.
I am embarrassed to admit those were the thoughts going through my head. I wasn’t really looking at the type of work I would be doing, only the fancy title or potential title I may one day achieve in the company. I daydreamed about…
People often comment on my relationship:
“You two are so good together”;
“You look so happy”;
“You have a special connection”;
“Your relationship looks so beautiful and amazing.”
People we know only a little, and close friends and family.
Our relationship looks amazing because it is amazing. When other people talk about their relationship being hard work, or a chore, or something that is a struggle, I cannot agree with them.
My relationship is anything but a chore or hard work. It is easy. It’s like a wonderful, peaceful, and relaxing holiday full of beauty and wonder.
It is the…
When this year started I had no idea this is where I would be. Living in Cape Town, South Africa. We planned a very different sort of life this year. And we got different. Just not the different we wanted.
We planned to move overseas. A move we had planned for over a year. And then everything happened this year and so our plans changed.